Wednesday, 15 January 2014

Don't jump off the bridge!!

Don’t jump off the bridge!!

Mr. D is a 63 years old single divorced man living in G* for 6 years was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. He is a civil engineer and used to work as a Math teacher in Africa. He described himself as qual(extreme distress of body and mind) with his feelings. He felt sad since he and his ex-wife divorced. He believe in community and saying that his stay in G* helped him to feel better with himself, to do some washing up, keeping the bed tidy and now he cook himself Vegan diet. He has had insomnia years ago and need to take sleeping tablets but still feel foggy in the morning. Now, his sleeping patterns have become normal although he is feeling tired most the time lying in bed. Nevertheless, when asked about what he enjoyed most, he said singing, going out to the city and writing a book. He felt that by writing a book helps him to express his feelings. He divorced in 1991 and had 2 daughters each 27 and 28 currently living in Scotland with the step father. He left Scotland because he was rejected for his project. He has applied for the Cork city partnership employment for people with disability. He finds drinking Ginseng tea help to boost his energy. He currently on Lithium, Epilim(sodium valproate), Serase and folic acid. No known drug allergies. He smokes 10-15 cigarettes per day for 30 years but trying to stop twice using Nicorette but unsuccessful. He is a binge drinker. There is no relevant family history of psychiatric illness. His father died at 73 years due to cataract complications during surgery and his mother died at 83 years of old age. All his 3 brothers are well and only one married but no children. He said he grew up in the argumented family with shouting to each other, mom being loud is the dominant one in the family while his father being a quiet one. He felt happy when his father put his hands around his mother’s waist but felt sad afterwards when his father put his hand away. He was good in school and very active when he was young. He is vulnerable with fighting environment like when he was in Belfast. He attempts suicide to jump off the bridge after following a crazy guy advice but fortunately he is saved by a couple after they rang the ambulance.  I advised him “if there’s one thing you can remember from this visit; Don’t jump off the bridge!”. 

This was my report for the visit but actually it was more fun and scary than what it seems. hehe. well at first, he welcomed with a warmth smile but afterwards when I start asking questions his face went blank and furious at some times and I don't know how to respond. I act normal and try to be natural. After a brief introduction, I asked:

Me: How r u feeling today? 
He: I feel nervous meeting with someone from one side of the world with different culture. HAHA. 

And then he start mentioning about Islam. and I asked what does he know about Islam? 
Misconceptions: Men are treated better than women. Quran is written by Prophet Muhammad. Islam is about war.Overwhelmed by the misconceptions, I tried to explain generally that there are not right. Suprisingly, he reads quran and finds it is poetic and many strories inside. 

While asking about his life, what makes him feel sad, one hypothesis I can come out is most of illness rooted from family breakdown;divorce. "I felt happy when my father put his hands around my mother’s waist but felt sad afterwards when my father put his hand away." He finds himself vulnerable in a fighting situation when his mom shouting at his father. 

And then when he told about his daughters, a light of hope appeared. I treasured them the most especially my youngest. She makes me laughed and tickles me, not physically. hehehe.. And when asked what makes he feels sad? He said "When I know I'm not going to meet my daughter for 12 months" . T.T At that moment, I picture my father in my mind and heart that I showed him the picture of my family in my tablet at the end of the visit. so personal. haha.. 

Few feedbacks from him that makes me feel much more confident: You have a very good eye contact, not like a psychologist who only jot down everything he says without looking at me! You know eye contact is the part of healing" You make me feel comfortable." =)

Trying my best to give dakwah to the people I met. And apparently, he is a very nice man. =)

Praying that everyone who is afflicted with any illness will recover by the healing of the Healer,Allah. =)

And when I am ill, it is He who cures me. Surah As-Syu'ra:80

Wednesday, 1 January 2014

Welcome 2014! =)

Assalamualaikum wbt,

Every second of every minute of every hour of every day of every week of every month of every year of every decade of our lives is an opportunity to do better than the previous one.-Mufti Menk

Alhamdulillah, lg beberapa jam lg nk msk tahun baru 2014. bukanlah beerti nk menyambut tp sebaiknye kte amek peluang utk audit diri. audit ape yg kte da wat selama tahun lepas or generally for this whole while 22 years living in this earth. amek peluang utk reflect ape yg patut kte wat lebih atau kurang. lebihkan yg baik dan kurangkan maksiat/lagha ok? bukan lebihkan gula plak...menyambut seru kerajaan utk berjimat eh? hee

bcoz they are getting married.. In shaa Allah..rinduu..<3

Ok la rsenye, kali ni nk jujur je la ape yg den rse for this whole while, i mean 2013 has been a great year after all but nevertheless ade cabaran dan dugaan, konflik yg telah dihadapi, berupaya utk mematangkan diri harapnye. walau ape pun yg berlaku, yakinlah ade hikmahNya. dan yakinlah dunia ini hanyalah sementara dan bertindaklah seperti seorang musafir yg hanya akn bawa ape yg perlu. but in mind, dunia inilah perjuangan hidup kte utk mencari redha Allah.

أَمۡ حَسِبۡتُمۡ أَن تَدۡخُلُواْ ٱلۡجَنَّةَ وَلَمَّا يَأۡتِكُم مَّثَلُ ٱلَّذِينَ خَلَوۡاْ مِن قَبۡلِكُم‌ۖ مَّسَّتۡہُمُ ٱلۡبَأۡسَآءُ وَٱلضَّرَّآءُ وَزُلۡزِلُواْ حَتَّىٰ يَقُولَ ٱلرَّسُولُ وَٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُواْ مَعَهُ ۥ مَتَىٰ نَصۡرُ ٱللَّهِ‌ۗ أَلَآ إِنَّ نَصۡرَ ٱللَّهِ قَرِيبٌ۬ (٢١٤)
“Apakah kalian mengira akan (dapat) masuk surge sedang belum datang kepada kalian (cobaan) sebagaimana halnya orang-orang terdahulu sebelum kalian? Mereka ditimpa malapetaka dan kesengsaraan serta digoncang (dengan bermacam-macam cobaan) sehingga berkatalah Rasul dan orang-orang yang beriman bersamanya: “Bilakah datangnya pertolongan Allah?” Ingatlah, sesungguhnya pertolongan Allah itu amat dekat”. (Q.S. al-Baqoroh [2]: 214).

dan kte perlu ingat setiap org ade struggle msg2 dan seharusnye kte struggle for the sake of Allah alone. in terms of our studies, amanah sbg seorang khalifah di bumi Allah ini, dan balance dgn sebg hamba Allah. ape2 pun it go back to basic our niat. niat yg ikhlas lillahi Taala..i know it's easier said than done, tp yakinlah dan teruskan berdoa moga Allah bimbing hati kte yg bersifat bolak-balik ni. Berdoa dari hati yg dlm penuh kerintihan meminta dariNya.

يَا مُقَلِّبَ الْقُلُوبِ ثَبِّتْ قَلْبِى عَلَى دِينِكَ
Yaa Muqallibal Quloob Thabbit Qalbee ‘alaa Deenik.
Oh turner of the hearts (Allah, the Most High), keep our hearts firm on your religion”[Authenticated by al-Albanee in al-Jaam'i as-Sagheer 1323/7988]
n juz like exams, life will gets tougher indeed time by time.. ujian adalah sebenarnye utk meninggikan darjat kte. 
missing mama n abah so much. =')
so, expect to bear heavier burden, bigger struggle.. huuuuuu..rsenye mcm da xmampu nk bernafas plak sebenarnye ble dok fikir satu satu tanggungjawab yg ade....semoga Allah kuatkan hati2 kte dan tsabatkan hati2 kte dlm perjuangan yg suci utk menegakkan Islam di muka bumiMu.  kuatkan diri dgn membaca AQ, menghayati kalam2 Allah, menulusuri sirah2 Rasulullah SAW dlm menyebarkan dakwah. betapa hebatnya ujian yg para Nabi hadapi, namun mereka tetap teguh dan istaqamah berdakwah menyeru manusia dgn kalimah syahadah La illa Ha illallah Muhammadur Rasulullah. ambil ibrah n follow their footsteps. 
nasihat yang baik dari seorang sahabat, Haziqah-quoted from buku PUISI13: 
Bila ketika datang rasa malas dan nafsu jahat datang, katakanlah pada diri sendiri:

"Kerana kamu, darah Rasulullah SAW mengalir, 
kerana kamu, air mata Rasulullah SAW mengalir"

Iqra' Iqra' Iqra'. baca baca baca. semoga ilmu yg dibaca bermanfaat utk diri dan ummah. 
Selamat tahun baru, semoga diri kte menjadi lebih baik dari sebelumnya. Aminn.. =)
teruskan berdoa utk saudara2 kte seluruh dunia terutamnya di syria, Palestin, Myanmar, Filipina dan dearest country Malaysia.